US Air Force Brings down UFO
[Associated Press EST 1200] Today it was learned that a US Air Force jet, scrambled to intercept an object of unknown origin, crashed into the object in the skies over Maryland and forcing it down. Early reports are unclear but sources say that the jet, piloted by Air Force Captain Robert Scrooge, flew too close to the UFO in order to identify it. Air Force base spokesman described the events as they unfolded. A bogey was picked up at 23:30 by ground radar and an order to intercept was given. The jet was airbourne at 22:35 and set on a heading to overtake the aircraft altitude at 10,000 feet.. As the on scene visibility was limited, being a foggy Christmas Eve, every attempt was made to contact the alien craft via several radio frequencies. Failure to establish radio comms, the pilot closed in for a better look at the “unknown”. He was homing in on a bright red “pulsating light” that appeared on the nose of the other aircraft when a sudden change of course and speed put the UFO directly in the path of the alert fighter. According to the pilot, the nose of his jet “harpooned” the fuselage of the intruder and he was forced to make an emergency landing in a grass field outside of Baltimore. The jet appeared undamaged but the UFO was a total loss, prompting Air Force officials and the National Transportation Safety Board to begin an investigation regarding the incident. The pilot of the downed aircraft, a Mister Claus of the North Pole, commented he wasn’t insured for this kind of thing but was confident that the government would reimburse him for damages. He was also optimistic about the possible use of a C-130 to help him complete his work, which consists of toy deliveries to good little girls and boys.
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